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~AlviNem

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No emotion.

Sat Jul 23, 2005, 1:42 PM
I haven't been updating my page in some time.
I moved to NY and don't have a computer yet.
My life is miserable right now, the dearest to me person was betrayed by my weakness, low self-respect and lack of respect for her.
I am dismal.
I regret things.
I am fucked up.
I am so confused that confused isn't even a word to describe it.
Thank you all the kind souls that have been very supprotive for a long time of me and my silly work.
I truly appreciate it.
I don't know when the next time will be for me to update this but I hope all of you are doing well.
I truly hope things will be better for me soon.
I have an immense inner conflict and my logical existence keeps fighting with my subconscious one.
Once again... I hope all of you are doing well.
Tanya, I am sorry for today, Saturday, I am fucked up and you probably shouldn't be around. What I did today was just pathetic and you are great and got a lot of my respect for not flipping out on me. Thank you.
...
:-(

32 Comments
  • Mood: _
  • Reading: Living with the Devil

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~eggwacker:iconeggwacker: Jul 23, 2005, 2:00:47 PM
Xander, everything will work out for good. Each day brings brighter and newer hope. Keep your chin up.

Sometimes, you just have to make it past the valley to enjoy the hills. Sounds like you're going through some valleys now, but they too shall pass. Enjoy your time out in NY. It's a busy city. Keep sane and keep creating art.

All the best wishes from the opposite coast.
~Shorty-tash:iconShorty-tash: Jul 23, 2005, 2:24:25 PM
hey u, ive had some pretty depressing news this end too, illnesses in the close family, wont go into it, but i felt how ur feeling, the best thing is to distract yourself whether its silly little doodals or big pieces that are influenced by what your going through. Although you feel like you wanna be on your own, friends and people that you love around yourself help you SO much, i didnt realise quite how much until you're there listening to them telling you stupid stories and hearing their laughter, it really helps.
chin up hun, and always smile :)
much love xxx

--
**www.natashalyons.co.uk**
~MoeGoofie:iconMoeGoofie: Jul 23, 2005, 2:39:42 PM
go to the gym. that's my lame advice. work thru your emotions. i'm having a piece of pie and it's making me sick. :hug:

--
:toast: + :milk: + :cookie: = :sushi: / :orange:
~PainIsBeautiful:iconPainIsBeautiful: Jul 23, 2005, 3:48:09 PM
Aw hun, I saw you come online, I wish i had messaged you.. =( things get tough in life, and everyone makes mistakes.. but mistakes are made to learn from them.. so learn from it.. things will get better.. hun you're a great guy.. you're smart and sweet.. not to mention pretty damn hott.. so.. just keep your head up.. im sure she knows you are sorry for whatever happend.. but sometimes things happen for reasons of which we are unsure of.. just learn from this.. all we can do in life is learn.. and grow.. =) cheer up, and remember DA loves you, especially me =D hehe :cuddle:

--
ooga booga
~EternalMoonlight:iconEternalMoonlight: Jul 23, 2005, 3:48:53 PM
baby everything is fine...and I know where you're comming from and do understand.
You really shouldn't be sorry.
Just, I dunno, feel better...Figure out what you want, and what is more important to you and just yourself>>>you have to figure yourself out. Yes, that.
I miss you too. (so pathetic)
And, you know, maybe everything will be fine with you and me...not now obviously...but sometime, somewhere.


~Luv, Tanya.
~AlviNem:iconAlviNem: Jul 24, 2005, 12:37:07 PM
Awww thank you sweetheart, im reading all these messages from people and they make me feel so much better!!! Thank you!!! Endless love for ya!! :hug:

--
Don't be afraid to become something that you are not. Always have trust in your ability to achieve great things, don't ever give up the belief. Continious effort - not strength or intelligence is the true key to unlocking our potential.
~AlviNem:iconAlviNem: Jul 24, 2005, 12:37:31 PM
Heh, I wish!!! I will start working tomorrow, that should be helpful!!

--
Don't be afraid to become something that you are not. Always have trust in your ability to achieve great things, don't ever give up the belief. Continious effort - not strength or intelligence is the true key to unlocking our potential.
~AlviNem:iconAlviNem: Jul 24, 2005, 12:41:45 PM
Thank you for your kind support!!! :) It helps

--
Don't be afraid to become something that you are not. Always have trust in your ability to achieve great things, don't ever give up the belief. Continious effort - not strength or intelligence is the true key to unlocking our potential.
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